Updated: Apr 9
Finding my Self on the long road back to Me.
"I Am ...? " A strangely small question that haunted me following a professional networking event I decided to attend years ago. In being asked to stand up in front of a group of eager and outgoing professionals waiting to share enthusiastically who they were and the business or industry they were passionate about, I found myself nervous and confused. I listened as others proudly and confidently stood up and stated "I Am so and so, and I Am a ... , I do ... and I am passionate about ..." As I prepared myself to stand up and do the same, I realized that the only thing that felt true in what I was about to say was my name. I worked in Real Estate Management at the time. A role which I held only as part of a long and messy 5 year personal search for the "perfect" self-defining career.
I realized suddenly, I didn't know who "I" was.
In a panic, I combed through my recent life experience looking for anything that would point me towards a passion or a circumstance I could proudly express. Nothing. Crickets. I was faced with an internal spinning wheel of processing ... processing ... and finally ... The connection has been lost, please try again. It was in this moment that my entire life changed as I realized that what I had lost connection to, was my Self.
This is where my journey of Self Illumination began.
A journey that started with the simple awareness that I lacked Self awareness. And a journey that started with one small step forward on a life path I had long since failed to see. The yellow brick road, paved just for me, which had always been under my feet. The road that was ultimately designed to lead me home to my Self. The Self that I continually discover and connect with as I face and overcome the perfectly timed challenges placed on this road, which allow me to unlock talents, abilities and passions unique to me.
This is where my real journey of self illumination and awareness began, at the age of 35, when I should have had it "all together" but lacked the awareness to see that feelings of purpose and fulfillment don't come from something outside of myself. I had to find the road that lead within. And this is where I Am Illuminated begins. A business based around the sharing of what I have discovered about myself on my road to personal illumination, and how it can be of service to those just starting out on their own. This is a journey and a path that I will continue to travel on until the day I move on from this life experience.
As I write this post, Robert Frost's famous poem comes to mind, The Road Not Taken. If I could sum up my journey going back to that day at the networking event up to now, I would make one small edit to the poem's last two poignant lines:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took mine,
And that has made all the difference.
Want to Join me on My Journey of Self Illumination?
Are you ready to start your own journey of Self Illumination? A journey towards a renewed connection to Self and awareness of your personal path, purpose and unique passions? I'd love to join you! Visit My Website or Follow Me on YouTube / Instagram @iamilluminatedtarot